A word of caution: there are many good men out there who will try to take advantage of a woman by pretending to be her boyfriend or husband, and using compliments as a weapon. Do not fall for these traps! It’s wrong! Compliments are never used in hurtful ways, and they never make someone feel inferior. So when someone tries to give you compliments to “improve” your relationship with her, listen. Here are some guidelines:

If the compliment sounds like an attempt to manipulate you into doing something undesirable-like getting a driver’s license after driving without a license for example-then it probably is. Good relationships provide an environment where people feel free to be who they really are. Good people love their careers, good people love their spouses, and good people love helping others do the right thing. In other words: a well-groomed woman will make a good teacher, a good mother will help protect her children, and a good worker will help reduce inflammation.

There are several grains that are good for you, and a few that are not. Rice and whole-grain breads and cereals, oatmeal, and bran cereals are good for reducing inflammation and maintaining healthy colon and intestinal function. In addition, soluble fiber from vegetables and fruits (especially dark leafy ones like kale and bok choy) helps lower cholesterol. Fruits and vegetables also provide essential fiber to help reduce inflammation and strengthen the digestive system.

A long-chain carbohydrate, bran is great for diabetics, indigestion, and heartburn. Brown or whole-grain breads, crackers, and granola bars can be part of a healthy diet, especially if eaten in the evening. Some studies even suggest that drinking a cup of coffee each day reduces the risk of diabetes. However, the best source of carbohydrates is unprocessed brown rice. For those who don’t like to make complicated carbohydrates, try unsweetened teas or smoothies made with fruits or vegetables, or b vitamins, instead. For those who want a sweet treat, baked or oatmeal cookies, muffins, and donuts make great desserts.

One of the least healthy choices, though perhaps one of the most popular, is potato chips. However, as tempting as potato chips can be, they are full of empty calories that can lead to weight gain and nutritional deficiencies. As an alternative to fries, try oven chips, which are made from whole-wheat flour. For a snack, consider nuts, seeds, or granola bars, which are both healthy and tasty. Also, nuts are a good choice for your dinner plate, as they are high in protein and good fats.

Finally, as with anything else, be careful what you buy and eat. Even with the best advertising policy, it would be wise to check the ingredients of any product you purchase. No good sources of fat should be included in a snack mix, for example, nor should any preservatives be found. With a little vigilance, you will be able to keep your diet healthy and stay fit.