When we think about nice, we probably picture someone who is a joy to be around. They make others feel good about themselves, are good influencers and have a bigger pool of genuine friends.
But nice can also mean something else entirely, and there are some people who use the word incorrectly and could be considered unkind. In fact, there are some situations in which being nice can be a bad thing for your relationships.
One reason why being nice can be a bad thing is because it takes the focus off of your emotions and your desires. If you try to hide your feelings or deny what you want because it doesn’t seem “nice,” you can quickly find yourself in a relationship that is superficial and lacking both depth and emotional intimacy.
For example, when you are feeling anxious or upset about something, it is likely that you have a lot of negative emotions roiling inside. When you try to stifle these feelings, they can easily grow into rage and depression, which will ultimately affect your ability to be in the best possible mood for work or relationships.
The opposite of being nice is being rude, which is a bad thing because it can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. If you are always rude, it can make it difficult for people to trust you and will result in them turning away from you.
This type of behavior can be hard to break, so it’s important to be aware that it can have a negative impact on your relationships. For instance, if you are always being nice to someone and you begin to see that they are taking advantage of you, it’s time to rethink your relationship.
You should also be aware that being nice can make it difficult for you to achieve your goals and dreams. For example, if you are always trying to please others and you don’t achieve the success you desire, you can become frustrated and lose confidence in yourself.
Another way that being nice can be a bad thing is that it can stifle your creativity. It can keep you from expressing yourself fully, so it’s important to be aware of this and work on developing your own unique style.
Toxic niceness can be a problem in organizations, where leaders often use it as an excuse to hide behind a veneer of civility, a cute nod to psychological safety, and a hologram that falsely signals inclusion, collaboration, and high performance. As a result, niceness can be used to camouflage a toxic culture that lacks intellectual honesty, candid feedback, and tough questions.
It can also be a way to avoid confrontation, which is also a bad thing because it can lead to feelings of resentment and bitterness. If you have an important decision to make, if you are going through a rough time, or if there is something very serious happening in your life, it’s best to speak up and let people know that you need help.